OK, listen, lady….this is the third time this week that you came home smelling like steak (and yes, we even know it was Black Angus steak, too) and we did not get any. Not even a nibble. We are holding your uniforms hostage until we receive something in return. Some wild Alaskan Salmon, perhaps.
Oh, by the way, don’t even try to blame the adult beverages that you were drinking, either…we know you just blatantly refused to bring us any. We have contacted the proper authorities and they are investigating!